Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Eleven

Yeah, I took the last two days off (holiday weekend and all) from blogging and updating everyone on Vinka's cat. As a gesture of apology for keeping the world out of the loop for the last two days, I offer the following joke, lame though this joke may be, but humor nevertheless...

 "SO not funny....I will have my revenge!"

Days Remaining: 12

Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Eight

"I will let you survive today if you can answer a riddle..."

"If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?"

Days Remaining: 13

Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Seven

 "Oh, crap...here they come again..."

"Hello Kitty!!!"

"Here, Kitty Kitty..."

"What a pretty kitty...c'mere?!?!"

"Back off, humans...lest I eat your souls for dinner!"

Days Remaining:  14

Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Six

 "Why do you people insist on coming back here?"

"Get the MEOW outta here and don't come back!

That is, unless of course, you bring me an offering..."

Days Remaining:  15

Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Five

 

"Na Na Boo Boo! You can't catch me!!!"

"Muhahahahahaha.....!!"

(She 'evil laughed' so hard, she threw her sweet face out of the shot...)

Days Remaining:  16

Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Four

Some of you may be wondering...

Do I provoke Vinka's kitty so that I can get these photos?

Do I antagonize and/or torture Vinka's kitty for the sole purpose of a funny post?

Do I hate this kitty?

My answer to all of these (and any related/similar questions of this nature) is a honest
-to-goodness, cross-my-heart and hope-to-die, pinkie swearing NO.

We go in.
We fill the food bowl.
We fill the water bowl.
We scoop the poop.

We find Vinka's kitty (she's usually in hiding and is never anywhere in plain sight) so we can make sure she is okay and to take one or two pictures. We might say (in a very sweet voice, mind you) "Hi kitty kitty!" just to get her to look in our general direction.

We leave.

Total time elapsed: 8 to 10 minutes tops

It takes longer to drive to Vinka's house than taking care of the kitty cat.

And I love all kitties...even this one.  I simply find it fascinating (and somewhat funny) how she behaves towards everyone but Vinka. There has to be a backstory and a reason that kitty is so terrified of everyone. When Vinka comes home I think I'll ask if her kitty has always been like that. 

Then there's always the dime-sized portion of my brain that thinks I'm Jack Hanna or something and I believe with all my heart that I can tame the kitty!! She will like me!!

And then the bleeding starts.

I still think she's saying in her own way that she loves me.

Days Remaining:  17

Injuries:  0

Near Misses: 2

Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Three

                                                     "I grow tired of you following me...
                                                   if you continue to do so, you will leave 
                                                             me no other choice..."

                                                                Days Remaining:  18
                                                                     Souls Eaten:  0

Adventures With Vinka's Cat - Day Two

                                                                "You? Again? Really?"

                                   "I have altered the litterbox...Pray I do not alter it further."

                                                                  Days Remaining:  19
                                                                          Injuries:   0

My Saturday: Two Hours of Fun

The air conditioner at Mom's is broken. It's flippin' hot.

In an effort to cool off, we decided to go run our errands for today. The car has a kick-ass air conditioner. Decision made.

Step One:
Need our fix...

Yes, smoking is awful. I know it's bad for me. Might even kill me. At least I know it won't stunt my growth (anymore).  But does it make me a bad person? Nope. Just stupid. I can freely admit to being stupid. I plan on being stupid for a little while longer, thank you.



Step Two:
Large coffee, six cream and four sugar

Anyone who loves me knows the quickest way to my heart is this simple concoction. I could replace every other beverage with this one. I despise what McDonalds attempts to call "food" and have refused to eat there. I could literally go on and on about my dislike, nay....hatred of what they serve, but I won't waste the space here.  Yet as much as I detest the food there, I love their coffee. It's a strange love affair that has continued for decades.  I even like it better than Starbucks. Better than anything available at the grocery store. It will probably be the underlying reason of my demise...

But, damn....it's good.

Step Three:
Fuel Up.

Papa Bear had to go inside to pay because of some new-fangled security thing that they do now if you use the same credit card more than once in 48 hours (he put gas in my car yesterday, today was his car's turn). They make you prove you are who you say you are and can use the card you say you can. I understand where this comes from and why, but it's a frustrating pain in the butt.

                                                       And yes, that is a skeleton in the car window. His name is Bob.

In today's case, the Gasoline Gods were smiling upon us! When he went in to pay, he came out with a surprise:

Doritos Mr. Dragon Fire Chips! So new that they aren't even listed as a product on the Doritos web site...
They were pretty good as far as Doritos go. I'm not a big chip eater - but I like spicy anything, but Papa Bear scarfed 'em down pretty quick...

Doritos recently came out with a line of spicy chips:

We have tried and liked:

1st Degree Burn Blazin' Jalapeno   These were tasty! But I couldn't eat more than five or six without hollerin' "Uncle!"  Lucky for us, Little Lawyer finished the bag for us after we couldn't feel our lips....

2nd Degree Burn Fiery Buffalo   These did actually taste like buffalo wings...but mild buffalo wings. Eh.

We have yet to find, much less try the last installment:  3rd Degree Scorchin' Habanero

Step Four:
Foodage

Having woken our appetites with a nibble of chips, we realized we were kinda hungry. We remembered some coupons Papa Bear had gotten the other day for a free Spicy Chicken Sandwich at Chick-fil-A, so our next destination was determined.

Step Five:
Kitty-Sitting

And it was very convenient that our food stop was a mere two minutes away from our next destination.  Our surrogate Mom, Vinka, is taking a well deserved vacation for the next three weeks in Serbia to visit her son (who is our BFF and cohort in crime, Steven, and her husband Sam, who is already in Serbia) and asked us to watch her kitty. I would do just about anything she asks, just because we love her so much. Plus, she's a great cook. I will be chronicling some of the amazing food she makes soon.

We used the opportunity to sit and quickly consume our lunch.

Papa Bear ate the free Spicy Chicken sandwich, which he claimed to be actually spicy!

I, however, opted for the standard original chicken sandwich, but upgraded to deluxe...(i.e., lettuce and tomato), because I like to live dangerously that way.

Here's the funny part:  This cat hates everybody but Vinka.  I couldn't tell you the cat's name (I'll call her Millie, because I think that's what I've heard Vinka call her...) and I've never even tried to pet her.

Because whenever anyone gets within a foot of Millie, all you see is this:



And that frightens me. Millie's never full-on attacked anyone as far as I know, but I don't really want to be the first one to find out either.

So then it occurs to me:  For fun, I should chronicle our adventures taking care of Millie!  Every day, I will take a photo of Millie for her and post it here so Vinka can see (1) that Millie is okay, and (2) that by my taking a picture of her every day, Millie hasn't killed us yet either.  Plus, I can do something fun with all the pictures for her at the end of the three weeks...

Step Six:
More kittehs...

Julius says: "No petting until you show me my food!"

More BFF's are out of town.  Everybody's having fun and we get to feed kitties? Wha...?  But it's all good, because I love Julius, Garth and Helga, who are the proud owners of Renee and Eric, who happen to be the people I want to adopt me if my Mother ever decides to disown me.

I love my kitties, Gizmo and Twinkie, but Renee and Eric's kitties come right after mine in the love department. Julius screams at me every time I see him - it's just hilarious! Garth and Helga, who are recent additions to the family, are slowly warming up to me. They'll have me wrapped around their little paws in no time flat...

Then we went home. Mom had someone come out and fix the a/c!

Yesssss!

And then it started to pour...and cool off everything!

Ahhhhh....

Adventures with Vinka's Cat - Day One

                      "Where's my Vinka? Why are you here? Geeeeeeeeet Ouuuuuuuuuuuut!"

                                                                   Days Remaining:  20